Ask Anything

Enough Testing

First opinion post – Existence is Dualistic

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This blog is set up as something of an experiential experiment.

Many people, including me, find it difficult at times to give an honest opinion. This is often out of fear of hurting the other persons feelings. But I believe (and experience has re-enforced this belief) that withholding or lying to someone to spare their feelings to avoid antagonism often ends up causing more and worse problems down the line.

Giving an honest opinion can be difficult and it has at times caused me heartache, mostly because people DO NOT always want an honest opinion, they may ask for it, but what they really want is to be reassured that what they are doing or what is happening is or will be ok.

The chance of heartache and difficultly is something I accept, because I know that many times listening to an impartial persons honest opinion has saved people, including me, from difficulties… and I also know people, including me, get in to problem that could have been avoided if they had asked for, listened to and considered the opinions of others.

I am not always right, nobody is all-knowing, nobody can foresee the twists and turns of future events. But right or wrong is not the point.

The point is… people need to LISTEN to other peoples opinions, DON’T just dismiss them just because you disagree (somebody else may know something you do not) or dismiss them because you don’t like the person (disliking them does not invalidate their opinion) or because you don’t understand them (if you do not understand, get an explanation).

 

So Do You Have a Question? Do You Want an Honest Opinion?

Click the link below and add a comment with your Question

http://thompearson.com/ask-a-question/

 

Thom

2 thoughts on “Ask Anything”

  1. Hi I’m Gina.
    I’m mother of two wonderful 10 years sons. Their father has left us 8 years ago.
    I have a question, maybe some of you can help me?
    At what age should a parent teach their son about ‘sex education’ if there is no father around or would it be better for the child to have a male family member to do this?
    It really bothers me because i’ve found adult magazine in Their room.

    Will be happy to hear any advice.

    1. Hi Gina,

      My opinion… As Soon As Possible.

      Every family is different, sometimes in small ways, sometimes the differences are huge.
      In some families, sex education feels natural and starts when the child is very young… some children are curious and will ask questions as soon as they learn to talk. Their question should be answered honestly. Sex education is a natural part of growing up.
      In other families, … well let’s just say, that does not happen.

      You say you found an adult magazine in their room.
      This is good, it gives you an opening to start a chat… BUT, it is vitally important that you handle this in a relaxed open way with the minimum of embarrassment… That can be difficult, you have to introduce the subject as though it is the most natural thing in the world, as something completely normal… which it is, it is completely normal.
      And, as I say above, do it As Soon As Possible. The longer you wait, the more difficult it will be.
      Start by assuring your sons that you are not angry or upset, assure them that what is happening is completely normal and you are pleased that they are growing up to be normal healthy males.
      Tell them you will answer any questions they may have. It may take some time for them to accept that you mean it, but if you are calm and you can suppress any embarrassment you feel and answer their question as honestly as you can you will have opened the way to further talks.

      You can do this. I believe it would be better if you initiated this rather than someone from outside your immediate family. After the initial introduction of the subject you can recruit a male family member to continue… but stay involved, You Are Important.

      And, yes I do know that overcoming embarrassment to talk to your sons about this can be difficult. It was difficult enough for me as a man to talk to my son. I managed to fake it to get through the first few minutes, after that it got much easier.

      I hope my opinion is useful to you 🙂

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